Sunday, 2 March 2014

Call In Shop, Reuterstr, Neukoelln, Berlin



My nearest Spaetkauf…Wednesday, Feb 5, 2014:
I need to print something.
Use their single, tinny, computer.
It freezes…immediately.
I wait….it will not unfreeze.
I switch it off…and on.
It freezes.
I switch it off…and on.
It freezes.
I switch it off…and on.
It freezes.
I give up…go to the Unfriendly Berlin Shopkeeper behind the counter.
ME: <Before I can say anything>
UNFRIENDLY BERLIN SHOP KEEPER: “60 cents!”
ME: “Er…it will not work. It freezes. Gestoppt, drei mal.”
UBS: “Why you not tell me, why you sit there for 30 minutes?”
ME: <Flummoxed. Was 10-15 minutes> “Er, so can you make it work?
UBS: “60 CENTS!”
ME: <Pause> “Okay…I pay you 60 cents. But I live opposite - and now I will never shop here again. Is that what you…”
UBS: <Interrupting> “JA, JA, JA <something something something unintelligible in German>

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